No Edgecuse
by suspect tomatoes
Summary: Classy title for a classy guy. Edge/OC. Matt/OC. One-shot.


**A/N: Wow. Late night IM's are really disturbing.**

"You really are a fucking retard if you can't see the way she looks at you."

Adam glanced at Britt, biting worriedly at his fingernails. "But she doesn't – "

"Do you have _Downs_?" Britt hit the side of his head. "She likes you. She _loves_ you. Just fucking take her out on a goddamn date!"

"I can't just _waltz_ up to her and – "

"Yes, you _can_."

Adam frowned. "But what if she says _no_?"

"She _won't_!" Britt pounded her forehead. "Christ almighty."

"I can't do it."

"Yes, you can."

"No."

Britt bit her lip from saying something she knew she'd regret. "Look. You play _the_ most confident guy on television today."

Adam nodded. "Yeah."

"Why don't you fucking... I don't know, harbor some of that?"

"Because then I'll say something rude, and she'll say no."

"You could fucking kick her dog off a cliff and she wouldn't say no to you."

"Wow." Adam laughed slightly. "Really?"

"Yes, you dumb shit!" Britt pushed him out the door. "Now, get going. I don't want Matt to see me talking to you."

"He still doesn't know you talk to me?"

"Shut up!" She looked down the hallway, then back at him. "No, he doesn't. And he never will. I gotta get in good with him, because I plan on being a Hardy within the next year."

Adam snorted. "Good luck with that."

"I don't need luck."

* * *

"You want me to _what_?"

MacKenzie looked up from the magazine she was reading, frowning at the stupid look on Matt's face. "What's the matter?"

"I still can't... " He scoffed. "You want me to _propose _to Britt?"

"Yeah."

Matt blinked when she started reading again. "Are you out of your _mind_?"

"I'm friends with you, aren't I?"

Matt took the magazine from her hands and tossed it onto the table. "Let's play a little game, okay?"

Mack rolled her eyes. "Yes, Matthew?"

"Let's pretend you actually have a heart. Let's pretend you don't know the meaning of dry wit or sarcasm. Let's pretend you really care about me and my well being. Can you do that?"

"I'm in love with Adam Copeland. I can't promise you any of that."

Matt clenched his fist against his leg. "MacKenzie, please? You're my best friend."

She sighed and crossed her arms, throwing her leg up onto his knee. "Give me a foot massage and it's a deal."

"Ew, no." He pushed it off. "Feet are nasty."

"Fine." Mack pushed her hair back. "What's up?"

"I – " Matt frowned when she started laughing. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, I sounded like R-Douche."

Matt looked at her. "I'm friends with him, you know."

"Of course, you would." She rolled her eyes. "Sorry."

Matt sighed, giving her one more look before he continued. "I just... You want me to propose to her? I can't seem to get my head around that."

"You love her, don't you?"

"With all my heart," he drawled.

"Then go for it."

"But – "

"Listen, Matthew. Yes, you've been through a lot. Yes, Amy broke your heart. Yes, you're a huge pussy for passing up an opportunity like this."

"Hey!"

"But seriously. Think about it. Britt's not gonna be around forever."

"That's bullshit, and you know it."

"Yeah, I know." She smiled slightly, nudging his side with her toe. "Come on, doofus. Just ask her. I know she'll say yes."

"So do I," he murmured.

"Then what's stopping you?"

Matt shrugged. "I'm scared."

"Of _what_?"

"That somethin'll happen."

"Like what? Adam can't do anythin' – Britt can't stand him."

He looked at her. "Why do you always have to open up old wounds?"

"I don't. I just pour salt in them."

"God, you two were _made_ for each other."

"I know. Too bad he doesn't know it yet."

Matt frowned slightly. "Have _you _made any moves yet?"

"Nah. I'm waiting for him."

"You might be waiting a long time."

"Hm, just like Britt?"

Matt closed his eyes. "MacKenzie, come on."

"What? I'm just stating a fact."

He sighed. "You think I should do it?"

"If you don't, I will."

"That's awkward."

"I know. So, giddy up!"

* * *

Adam stopped pacing outside the catering room, looking up when the door opened. He frowned when Matt stepped out, noticed him, and kept on his way. It didn't surprise him – they weren't exactly on _speaking_ terms, but he thought an acknowledgment would be _polite_.

Says the guy who stole his girlfriend.

Adam caught the door before it closed, peering into the empty room. MacKenzie was sitting on the far couch, flipping through some scandal magazine. She looked beautiful; so beautiful, his heart started exploding inside his chest.

MacKenzie looked up and jumped slightly. "Adam?"

He smiled and came inside, shutting the door with his back. "Uh, hi."

"Come in, don't stand over there."

"Oh. Okay." He hesitated, then stalked over there, standing at the edge of the couch.

MacKenzie looked up with a grin, patting the spot beside her. "Wanna sit?"

He nodded and slid next to her.

She waited patiently, her feet curled up, resting her arm against the back of the couch. When he didn't say anything for a couple of minutes, she sighed.

He looked up. "What?"

"Was there a particular reason you came here for?"

"Yes, but I can't remember now."

"Why's that?"

"I uh... " He swallowed hard. "I saw you."

MacKenzie smiled softly. "Aw. That's cute."

_Now's your chance_. Adam lifted his gaze and found her staring at him, the smallest smirk playing on her lips. "Mack, I was just wondering..."

"Yes?"

He closed his eyes. "If you wanna get something to eat after this?"

Silence.

He peeked a look at her and found her full-blown smiling.

"How long have you been wanting to ask me that, Adam?"

"Honestly?"

She nodded.

He shrugged, smirking. "Since the first day I met you."

* * *

"Britt, we need to talk about something. No, no, that's lame." Matt took a deep breath. "Britt, I need to ask you something. No, no." He slapped a hand over his eyes. "This is hopeless."

"Talking to yourself again, Hardy?"

Matt's eyes opened against his palm. _Shit_. "Britt?"

Her hand covered his, taking it down so he could see her. "Peek a boo," she said quietly. "What's shakin'?"

All the words he'd practiced, all the scenarios that had gone through his head, all the ways he'd figured out how to say this suddenly vanished from his brain, and he was left standing there, speechless.

She frowned. "Matt, are you okay?"

"Wanna get married?"

She blinked at him. "What'd you say?"

"Fuck!" Matt turned away, punching his fist against his forehead. "I fucked it up, already. Goddamn it, I _told_ Mack this would happen."

He felt Britt's hand touch his shoulder, and he shut his eyes.

"Matt, turn around."

He looked at her, up and down, frowning. "Sorry. I ruined it."

She shook her head. "I don't understand."

"I just... Did you hear me?"

"No. You sounded like a retarded monkey. For real."

"Oh, thank God!"

She made a face. "Uh... Praise the lord?"

Matt smiled at her, pushing her hair away from her face. "I need to talk to you about somethin'."

"For real?"

He nodded. "For real."

* * *

"Adam, I gotta ask you something."

He looked up at MacKenzie, frowning. "What?"

"What fucking took you so long?"

Adam laughed quietly, moving a little closer to her. "Frankly, I was scared."

"No. Shut up."

He nodded. "Yeah. I was being a wuss and I know it."

"Wow. Am I that intimidating?"

"Not really." He put his hand out, then hesitated, before settling it against her cheek. "You're just... I don't know. So... perfect. I couldn't bring myself to ask you because there was always this possibility that you would say no."

"Was there?" She smiled, leaning into him a little. "From what I recall, you could kill my mother with your bare hands and I'd still say yes."

"Yeah, Britt said that."

"Britt knows me."

"That she does – "

"Wait, Britt? Why were you talking to Britt?"

"Oh, fuck." Adam widened his eyes. "Don't tell anyone. Please."

"Don't tell anyone what?"

"That Britt and I are friends."

MacKenzie blinked at him. "That's a pretty lame joke, Adam."

"It's not a joke. She's the one who's been pushing me to ask you out."

"_Really_?"

"Yeah. She said she owed it to you, after you got her and Matt together."

MacKenzie nodded slowly. "But... She hates you."

"Yeah, but it's mutual." He smiled slightly, rubbing the skin just below her jaw. "She finally knocked some sense into me today."

"I noticed." MacKenzie moved in slightly, her legs fitting perfectly against the curve of his side. "Thank God for that."

"Yeah. I know." Adam looked down, trailing his hand against her shoulder, pushing the mocha strands away from it. "So, what do you want to do tonight? God, your hair is soft."

"So's yours." MacKenzie pushed her fingers through his feathery locks, closing her eyes at the wonderful feeling. "Um... I don't know. What do you wanna do?"

When he didn't answer her, she opened her eyes, meeting his cheek-denting smirk.

She slapped his chest. "You're a pervert."

"So are you!"

MacKenzie smiled, putting her arms around his neck. "Yeah, but I hide it well."

* * *

"I can't wait to tell MacKenzie!" Britt danced down the hallway, smiling every time Matt came into her view.

He was walking behind her, the biggest crooked grin on his handsome face. "I hate to break it to you, sugar, but she already knows."

"No, she doesn't." She spun into his arms, resting her hands against his hard chest. "She knows you were _going_ to. She doesn't know that you _did_."

"I guess."

Britt flitted away from him, skipping down the hallway. "Oh, my God, I'm so happy!"

"I can tell, baby." Matt shoved his hands into his pockets, smiling dreamily at the way she moved. "By the way, what kind of ring do you want?"

"Surprise me!"

"Can I get a rough estimate?"

"You certainly can." Britt winked and pushed him against the wall, keeping her lips close enough to his without kissing them. "How _rough_?"

Matt smirked, chocolate eyes sparkling. "Big? Modest? _Ostentatious_?"

She squealed. "I like the sound of _ostentatious, _you little word nerd."

"Ostentatious it is." He pressed his lips down, groaning softly when she pulled away. "Where are you goin'?"

"To tell MacKenzie!" She hopped to the door at the end, skidding to a stop in front of it. "She's in catering, right?"

"That's where I left her," Matt said, coming up beside her.

"Good. _MacKenzie_!" Britt flung the door open, but stopped, eyes wide. "Jesus Christ!"

"What?"

She slammed the door before Matt could peer in. "Nothing."

He frowned. "Was she in there?"

"Um... Yes. At least... it looked like her."

"Well... What's the matter?"

"She was... busy."

"Doing what?"

Britt clucked her tongue a few times. "Eating."

Matt rolled his eyes, turning the door knob. "Just tell her – "

"Don't open that!"

"_Why_?"

"She's uh... she's busy."

"I think she can stop for one second and – "

"Nope! No, she can't. She'll get super pissed if we bother her right now."

Matt frowned. "She'll really get that mad?"

"Oh. She'll hate us."

"Why?"

"She's just been really edgy lately."

**A/N: Hm. Only in a perfect world. Review.**


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